Greetings! My name is Dewey and I’m the Information Office for The General’s TEAM. I’m the town’s library cat, which is why I know so much about everything.
Today I thought I would enlighten you about Mortimer’s Interspecies Translator. This invention, previously known as the Legacy in earlier versions of Cindy’s book, is cleverly disguised as a red and black-checkered hunting cap, like this one. It is being modeled next to Molly, one of Cindy’s real cats who insisted on being in my picture.
IT is quite interesting really, an assistive technology which allows humans to overcome their lack of telepathic abilities, resulting in enhanced interspecies communication.
_____
FLASH: Dewey, this is a blog for kids! Nobody’s gonna understand a word you’re saying. If you want a turn, you’ve got to talk about something interesting—like maybe you should tell the kids about ME!
DEWEY: Inventions are interesting, Flash. Don’t you want your blog to be educational?
FLASH: NO! I want it to be fun!
DEWEY: Can I tell them how the Dander Zapper works with ultraviolet wavelengths?
FLASH: NO! Absolutely not!
RINGO: Hey, Dewey, maybe I could help you think of something. When I posted my advice column I got the most visits to the blog ever.
FLASH: Great. Thanks for reminding me, Ringo. Way to make me feel bad.
RINGO: Dude, I only got two more than you, so it’s not that big a deal. Oooh! Ooooh! I know! Dewey could have a totally awesome column about inventions. Like this:
Dear Dewey,
My little brother is driving me crazy sneaking into my room. How can I stop him?
Susie
And Dewey could answer:
Dear Susie,
Hork up a juicy hairball right in your doorway, then when he tries to sneak in your room it’ll squish between his toes. He’ll be so grossed out he’ll never go in your room again.
DEWEY: That’s not an invention!
RINGO: Sure it is. Kind of.
FLASH: Oh brother. Why did I ever decide to let you two jokers have a turn on my blog? Go back and figure out something good to write before you take another turn!
DEWEY: Maybe the kids would have an idea for us.
RINGO: Far out! Good thinking, Dewey! These kids are smart, they’re sure to have some ideas! Well? We’re waiting . . .
flashthecatblog 
Dewey, does your library have coffee? I don’t like the smell of coffee, and when I go into libraries and book stores that sell the really strong stuff I get a headache. I love books, and it makes me sad when I can’t enjoy special places that have lots and lots of books because of the horrible coffee smell.
No, my library does not have coffee. That’s because Ringo’s cafe is right across the street. People can buy coffee there! Or get their famous chocolate milkshakes!
I would like the chocolate milkshake.
Me, too! It’s made out of dairy products, and cats love that!
I wish I could post this awesome sound I have of somebody yelling CHOCOLATE! because that’s what I would do. CHOCOLATE!
Most humans do like chocolate, I know Cindy does.
the hair ball thing was good
I’ll tell Ringo you liked it. That will make him happy!
Dewey, I am impressed to “meet” a library cat.
Loving libraries the way I do, I think it would be awesome to be sitting in the library reading a book and having a cat come curl up on my lap, purring.
Do you every visit library patrons like that? Just wondering …
I try to greet everyone, but I only sit on the laps of those I really like. Unless the patron does not like cats, then I leave them alone.
Dewy,
Why don’t you keep explaining the inventions;but in KID language.
Nicole
Hmm. What a novel idea! I don’t believe I’m very fluent in kid language, but maybe Ringo and Flash could help.
it is so great to meet u Dewey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! in my thought i think you should keep talking about inventions but in a way that kids could understand ❤ 🙂
Thank you, Kaitlynn! It’s lovely to meet you, too. You have the same brilliant idea as Nicole. I will definitely work on that for my next turn on the blog.
Flash do you Ringo, and Dewey do good together? I have a friend and his name is Jeromiah
and he thinks that Dewey deserves a turn once in a while. I don’t really get what he means
because I think all three of you are handsome and I don’t mean to hurt Ringo and Deweys
feelings because I really thnk they are handsome but Flash I think you are the handsomest
on this blog. And of course Jeromiah posted some notes on this blog.
Your #1 fan,
Anna
Yes, we usually get along pretty well now. In my story I don’t like Dewey very much till the end, and then we become friends while working together to defeat Lucy. But sometimes he still gets on my nerves since he is a know-it-all. I’ll let him and Ringo have a turn sometimes. I’m glad you think I’m the handsomest. I know I am!
Well I’m glad that you get along pretty well now. I’m trying to get along with my
brother but I found out that everyone has a different personality. I can see that
getting along with someone is a lot of work. Do you have a brother? Do you have
any suggestions on how to get along with a brother, Flash?
Your #1 fan,
Anna
Yes, getting along can be work but it’s usually worth it. In my story I had a sister, but she got adopted by someone else so I haven’t seen her since we were kittens.
I fill bad that you are all alone with no sister anymore.
Yes, it was sad. But now I have the TEAM and Eric. And all of my fans!
hey flash (your the best but don’t let anything get in between you and your friends) you should let everybody who wants a turn have a turn becuz you let ringo have a turn so why not dewey YOUR #1 and ONLY FAN
Yes, Dewey can have a turn as soon as he figures out what to write about. Any ideas for him?
an alarm system for Susie
You mean Lucy, the evil butt-sniffer?
haha flash but did u miss me did ya did ya did ya
Absolutely!
I understand what dewey is saying. (Aleast there’s one benifit to knowing computer programming)
Well, thank you. See, Flash? Some kids can understand me!
I like your post dewey :D. I still think all the cats should have a turn.
I do believe Flash has given us all permission. I haven’t heard yet if The General and Spike are planning to take him up on his offer, though.
Dewey,
Do you have a favorite book?
I’ve read many, many books in my life. I do live in a library, after all. So I will have to think about that question. It might make a good topic for my next post, thanks for the suggestion.